My kid is having fucking DEPRESSION.
Why is this happening to me?
Things are not going well. WHY is all these happening.
I am asked to leave the company.
For a reason I cannot even accept. With that, I cannot have any promotion, increment, or bonus no matter how hard i work. I am even made redundant? WTF??
They better give my hubby increment this year!!!
Now Alexis wants to quit piano, I push all the way until Grade 6 and then now tell me she wants to stop. One waste my money until Grade 4, the other one waste it until Grade 6. Did they really think I print money?? I worked so hard for them, are they appreciative? I really don't know.
Why is parenthood so hard, so difficult, so shitty?
Father, why is there all these things in my life? Why can't it be smooth sailing?
Why at 47, I have to be clearing debts, see no $ in my bank acct and no savings, and i dun even see investments, OMG.
Then look at Clarice with needing tuition with all her subjects.
Is it really how this is going to be from now?
Why can't my career take flight? I am stuck in the same place for 3 years for nothing.
Pple having performance bonus, increment, 13th month, I get nothing.
Lord, I am breaking, and I am torn and feel miserable for myself inside.
I talked about staying in a condo, but actually I dun see myself having that at all.
I just might die with that one regret in my life.
I duno what I want with my life. I am no longer in my teens, I am reaching my 50s.
I hate my age, but there is nothing I can do about it.
I want an Ecommerce store but I am not fully equipped to set it up. I am like a Jack of all trades, but Master in none.
End up now, my job is more administrative than doing marketing.
I know it deep in my heart, the company's emphasis is not here, but still i harbour hopes.
I want to sleep through it, I wana give up. I wana juz let everything crashed. I just dun wana care anymore.
God, can you take all these away and make 2021 a better year? Juz let it be a better year pls.
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